Weight

Topic says it all right? After I had Little Man, the weight fell off. I was amazed. Each day I'd weigh first thing to see how many pounds I'd lost overnight. Once I was about 3-4 pounds from pre-pregnancy weight, it pretty much stopped. I was also breastfeeding. I wanted to loose weight BEFORE getting pregnant! Let's see the numbers...don't laugh. My first pregnancy visit I was 154. 135-140ish looks best on me. So I was shooting for 140. Oh well. While breastfeeding (for 3 months) I was 158. A month or so after I stopped nursing, I'm around 168-170. That's embarrassing to say, but I guess I feel better for admitting it and just putting it out there! I guess after being pregnant for 9 (10?) months and then nursing, I was just used to eating more and it not affecting me! I've been thinking about it alot lately and complaining to DH. I finally got him to admit I needed to loose some! That would make some mad but I made him say it and he didn't say anything in a mean bad way. I need to really work on it now before it gets out of control. So a few days ago I started paying attention to calories. I did my BMR online and it says I use like 1500 calories a day to maintain my weight. That's not a lot to me! I was hoping it was like 2500 (LOL) so I could cut down to like 1500 and lose weight easier! So my goal is around 1200 a day. I've been eating TONS of fruit. I don't know if that's bad. Example, I'll eat a banana with breakfast and then an apple between breakfast and lunch. Later I may eat another banana and afer supper I'll cut up some fruit in a bowl for dessert. I don't know if too much can have bad affects? Anyway. I feel better already. I never really felt like I was eating a lot...I really wasn't! But I guess maybe now I'm just eating better and hopefully it'll help. DH has been hearing me say I was gonna diet for months now and I really wanna prove to him and myself I can do this and not give up on myself! It's just really hard. I love food, it's all good!! So when I wanna go snack on some chips or whatever I literally have to go through a thought process to keep myself from doing it! I know it'll get easier..especially if I can see some weight come off. I am miserable at my weight now and I am always concious of it. I don't even want to be around our friends right now because all the girls are smaller than me and looking good for summer. Hardly any of my clothes fit and hardly any of the ones that do fit, fit well! blah blah blah..I know, you've heard it all before from someone.